HW 21b- Comments

NatalieK said...

I liked that you made a lot of connections in your post, but maybe you could've elaborated a little more. For instance, did it seem to help your mother's friend feel more positive when you avoided the subject of death? Or maybe, why was it so spectacular to you that Beth had her 13 year old son help her? I can imagine why, but it would be interesting to hear about it too. Otherwise I thought your post was really interesting considering the fact that you seemed to be able to understand Beth's motives through your own personal experience.

December 9, 2010 7:02 PM

Devin said...

I liked your first connection about visiting your good friend's mother with ALS in the hospital and how you would chat about the Patriots (cannot believe you're a Patriot fan) in order to keep the conversation upbeat. I know that ALS is a terrible disease and it would be interesting to hear how seeing someone with it firsthand affected you. I myself have never been with anyone with a serious disease. I think that having that experience must be powerful and important in the way that it makes death and dying more real, making us aware, as Beth said, of our own mortality. I also liked the connection you made to Beth's taking care of her husband with only the help of her son when you told us that your aunt took care of your sick grandmother all by herself. I think it must be true that many more women take care of sick and dying relatives than men do. It's obviously much nicer for a sick person not to have to be in the hospital but it must have been a huge burden in this case for your aunt.

December 10, 2010 10:07 PM

Jim Harker said...

"For as long as I can remember ... She was ill for her entire life..." This is a really powerful image - that all we may really know or remember about a grandparent is the time when they were sick, frail,or incapacitated by disease at the end of their lives. You knew your grandmother for the eight years of her final illness, but didn't have the chance to know her life prior to the illness. I think it's the relationship and history of people BEFORE the illness that gives both the patient and the caregiver the strength to stay positive and loving as you fight against the disease. That's what makes it possible to chat about the Patriots - some things you may not be able to share anymore, but you look for all the things you still CAN share. A sick person's 'road' is a much slower journey than young, healthy, busy people 'walk'. You have to slow way down to the sick person's pace, and look for ways to 'walk' together.

December 11, 2010 6:57 AM

TIM said...

I really liked when you said "I imagine that the fact that Evan and Josh were so close to their father was a very good thing, but it also probably made it harder for them when he passed away." I know from experience that when you are not as close to a family member, it is not as hard to deal with their death when the time comes. So it would make sense if the closer you are to someone the harder it is to deal with their passing. I also liked the way you were able to connect the ideas that Beth had to your own life and it would have been nice to hear more about her experience if she said anything else.

December 11, 2010 11:03 AM 

 

                  My comments on other group members-

Ben H said...

I love the depth of thought that you put into this homework. For instance, when you said "Without relationships, maybe you would treat death as an old friend, ready to finally take you away. We seem to only fear death because of fear of what we’ll miss." That statement really got me thinking, and was more insightful than anything I could have thought of. I also really liked the way that you represented many of your ideas. You asked the reader a lot of questions, a technique that for me, adds more meaning to what you're saying and certainly captures my attention more than just ordinary statements. Great Job! Ben H said...

My favorite thing about this homework is what a good job you did using the insights of Beth and connecting them to your own life. For instance, I thought it was very interesting how you were able to relate something like the time standing still in Erik's situation to your own experience in a soccer game, when normally the two situations would be completely different. I also like when you said, "I like the idea of people having some kind of awareness of their own death and being brave enough to fight it or brave enough to want to accept it and go to it like some new part of the world not yet visited," because it really got me thinking about the way I vew death. Great job!